It was extraordinarily noisy today in my area of Cubeville. I was in a horrible mood all day – feeling very unappreciated and irritated by a few folks. I mean, seriously, there are conference rooms all over the freakin’ place, don’t turn the volume up on your phone, sit behind me with another person and have a goddamn conference call with a load of other people. RUDE!!!
Anyway, in an effort to drown out the assholes, I switched off the radio option on my mp3 player and had to crank some music. I’ve got a very eclectic mix. Right after I got done rockin’ out to Live, the Jackson 5’s “I’ll Be There” came on. I found myself with my fingers just resting on the keyboard. I couldn’t do anything but listen to the voices. Not the words, necessarily, just the voices. Those sweet, innocent voices full of so much hope and promise.
My anger and frustration waned and I was left with a sadness that I could feel in my stomach. Like when you get to the end of a book or movie and it’s one of those dramas that ends in tragedy. You start off with a family, or any group of characters I suppose, and they have nothing but dreams for the future and everything seems to be going their way. At least to the outside observer. But as the chapters unfold, one disappointment leads to another until, at the end of the story, there’s nothing but failure and regret.
I don’t think I’ve ever given the Jackson family much thought. No more than anyone one else I suppose. I’ve lusted after Janet, felt sorry for Tito and Jermaine, laughed at Latoya, and been shocked and amazed by Michael, but I think that’s how most folks have reacted to them. But how must they see their family and how it’s turned out for them? Not that their lives are over, but if they were a movie starring um, let’s see, who plays a lot of hard-luck types of characters, um, Mickey Rourke or Courtney Love, we’d be heading for the exits wiping the tears away and shaking our heads. That’s sort of how I felt today while hearing those young boys sing. I felt sad for them all. And a little sad for me, too.